2023 and me.
A year in review....
...that starts with a most recent memory of Thanksgiving, which was a non-traditional experience for us this year. We ate BBQ at the bottom of a ski hill in Winter Park with new-ish friends we’d never dined with before, and didn't consume one traditional Thanksgiving Day food (well maybe the apple crisp for dessert sort of counts). While I certainly missed our larger family celebration, I enjoy the randomness of celebrating a holiday in a different place, with unusual customs and traditions. It encourages me to find comfort and create new experiences right where I’m at.
With 2023 coming to a close, I’m in full 2024 planning mode around what I want to do and experience in the coming year because that is how I’m wired. I'm making New Year's resolutions, have next year's journal ready to go, and am already putting together my 2024 list of books to read (send over any recommendations, please). While I am definitely in a "what lies ahead" mode, I'm taking the time to reflect on the past year of experiences, learning moments, and challenging situations to help refine where and how I'll step into 2024. These are my self-reflections and what I'll be reminding myself of throughout next year.
Lean into the hard: Like many of you, I found myself navigating some tough situations this year that came at me unexpectedly, seriously testing my emotional well-being. While I wanted to escape and hide under the covers, I found that my best way through this was to reconnect with a few core, solid people in my life who lent their perspective, support, prayers and patience while I struggled and persisted. While these situations were my biggest upsets of the year, they were also the ones where I grew the most. Leaning into the hard has a lot to teach us if we're open to it. As Dr. Kristen Neff puts it "Suffering is a part of life. May I be kind to myself at this moment. May I give myself the compassion I need."
Roll with resistance: I have big expectations of people (simply ask any member of my family and you'll be met with instant agreement). The downside to this is disappointment when others let me down when I have unrealistic expectations of others' intents, abilities, and motives. I remind myself of the mantra that I like to share with others "Be curious, not furious" and seek to understand the why behind others' behaviors. By doing this, I can learn to roll with the resistance and start to adapt my behaviors to meet others where they're at.
Stay well-boundaried to protect my values: I love to work (and love the work I get to do), I love to volunteer my time to causes that matter to me, and I enjoy social events, networking, and getting together with friends as much as possible. However, experience has shown me that too many of these "yeses" are counter to one of my top five values: spending quality time with family. Looking back on this year, I'm proud of myself because I think I did a good job creating healthy boundaries that allowed me to honor this important value. Now the trick will be to repeat that in 2024.
Do more new, fun stuff: We get complacent in our lives as we are creatures of habit. We drive the same routes, eat at our favorite places, and let routines take precedence in our days. Some of you may recall our family's RV trip around the U.S. in 2021, which promised new adventures daily. When we returned home, we quickly fell into old patterns and I felt the boredom of routine creeping in. Therefore, I decided to become a tourist in my town. This took the shape of visiting new museums, walking different trails closer to home, seeking out new musical events, and showing up in different communities close to home.
As we wave goodbye to 2023, let's not just close a chapter but sketch out some amazing moments for the ones coming up, perhaps drawing on what YOU learned about yourself this past year.